The Stages of Change

Do you remember what it was like when you were learning to ride a bike?  How to play an instrument, or drive a car?  The first few weeks and months may have been a struggle, but the results were so sweet!  Mastering a new skill brings a sense of freedom and accomplishment like none other — but there is a process involved.

Many people enter counseling because they are ready for change.  They want to get from Point A to Point B, learn new skills, and write the next chapter of their story.  What some clients don’t realize is that making changes in mental and emotional health and lifestyle is almost never a “quick fix.”  Learning and developing new patterns of thinking, feeling, and behavior takes time.  If you are willing to engage in that process, you can enjoy lasting, meaningful changes in your life.  Here is a brief rundown of The Stages of Change — they are the same for counseling, riding a bike without training wheels, and playing a violin sonata by heart!

Present Behavior: This is Point A — where you are today.

Awareness: If you know what you want to change in your life, you’ve made it to the awareness stage!

Frustration: As you start learning and implementing new skills, it can feel frustrating.  Sometimes you have to unlearn old skills before you can learn and implement new ones.

Awkward Beginnings: Giving the new skills you’ve learned a try often feels like two steps forward, one step back.  Most of the time counseling is spent in this stage and the previous one.  Don’t let the frustration or the awkwardness stop you from continuing on.

Integration: In this stage, you start to see the fruits of all of your hard work.  You’ve made the new skills a part of your life.

Maintenance: As the old saying goes, “if you don’t use it, you lose it.”  Remember what you’ve learned throughout the process, and find a way to keep yourself accountable to continue using your new skills and enjoying the positive changes in your life!

At Second Story, we are committed to working through these stages in order to help our clients create lasting change.  If you are interested in learning more about this process, please feel free to reach out.  We’d love to talk with you!

Audrey Aukeman  |  MA, LLPC