Category: Processing

Turning off endless thoughts and rumination can be a difficult task for many people (in fact, 6.8 million people across the US).  So, it should not be shocking that we all may experience similar instances, or even times of day when we find it difficult to turn off the worry.  Some people may experience anxiety in the morning, throughout the day, or all-times revolving around sleep.  Have you ever been abruptly woken up from a deep sleep trying to figure out the world’s problems—many of us have! Or, are you the jealous type who envies your spouse for catching ZZZ’s moments after hitting their pillow—meanwhile, you are left alone with your thoughts for hours on end?! The thoughts can be endless, and thoughts do not necessarily have to be distressing in nature to be, well, distressing. 

Humans have the ability to think and think and think, without ever really finding the end of the thought—we simply ruminat ...

For years I often heard people say that you have to go through grief and pain, you can’t go around it, you can’t go above it, you have to go through it. For years I didn’t understand what that meant. We live in an incredibly emotionally avoidant culture which then leads to chronic mental emotional health struggles, high addiction and disconnection from self and others among other symptoms. 

In order to move through grief or pain a person must create a safe space for emotions to build. Like a wave on a beach, emotions need to be able to build and crash safely on the shore before they can recede out and become calm again. Instead of allowing the natural flow, we often dam up the water as high as we can to keep it from crashing, but then when it inevitably breaks the dam, and the lifetime of suppressed emotions can come cascading and flooding ...

A healthy, regulated nervous system is vital for good mental health. The nervous system is responsible for discerning our general wellbeing and it warns us when we’re no longer safe. For example, we may be experiencing fear or heightened anxiety in the face of a confrontational conversation with someone we love. We may feel that by our hearts racing, having trouble thinking clearly, shortness of breath, or wanting to run away as we’re having that conversation. Other times, we may shut down, disconnect or ghost people in order to avoid a challenging situation. In any of those scenarios, our nervous system is experiencing some sort of dysregulation through overstimulation or shut down. We do not feel safe and our nervous system is working properly by letting us know and moving us into the primal, protective part of our brain. 

Maybe we face that fear and address the challenging conversation a ...